Thursday, November 19, 2015

Balance




Much of life is about balance.  We strive for balanced eating, a balanced budget and for me most recently; a life-work balance.  I have spent the past 10 years being a stay at home Mom to my beautiful daughters.  I was responsible for the day to day balance of our lives and making sure things ran smoothly.  I had lots of time to plan, implement and make changes.  I worked tirelessly to create routines and thus balance for my family.

All that changed two months ago when I decided to take on a part time job.  Suddenly I am a Mother who works.  I had prepared for the change as well as I could but I was sadly mistaken at how hard it would be to find balance.  I have some tools that are paramount to keeping my family running smoothly; the most important is without a doubt my wall calendar.  Yes, I use an electronic one as well but the one that is essential is the good old fashioned wall kind.  I have been buying the same one for years now.  Yet somehow I still fall behind. 

As our activities ebb and flow so does my ability to be organized. One week I will find myself the epitome of organized.  I have a meal plan, errands planned by day and even activities to do with the kids. I appreciate how much simpler my life is when it is mapped out day by day, yet a small part of me misses the spontaneity that flying by the seat of your pants provides. Alternately, after a few weeks of not being organized my anxiety increases until I feel it’s time to buckle down yet again and plan, plan, plan. 

For some reason I have difficulty finding a way to make both parts of me work in harmony.  The organized part of me is the do-gooder, the in control, responsible adult.  Yet the impulsive side of me is fun, creative and carefree.  I am totally aware of the dichotomy that I’ve created.  Both sides have their own strengths and weaknesses yet I can’t seem to fuse them into one self.  Can you plan to be carefree?  Is that even possible? 

As I continue to get used to working and mothering I am hoping that a pattern emerges, a routine.  With so many variables (different schedules, activities etc.) it’s going to take some time to get it all worked out.  Most of all I need to remember to be kind and patient with myself. It will come, in time.




Monday, October 19, 2015

My Demon


Some days, I totally forget about you. Days go by with nary a dark thought or emotion. I can almost believe that I am normal, cured. Then when I least expect it and without any precursor you come back. 

You start as a dark cloud hanging over my head and slowly but surely you seep into all that I am. I choose to sleep to keep you quiet but you're also in my dreams. You remind me of all the mistakes I have made. You call me names and put me down. You are the worst kind of bully there is, one that I cannot quiet. I wonder why, when I do everything that I'm supposed to, you still slink back into my world.

 I fear that I will never be rid of you. Even when you stay away for long periods of time, a small part of me always awaits your return. I wonder what it's like to live a life free of this burden. I keep my battle to myself, within me. I'm afraid that if I let you out there will be no turning back, no controlling you. I suffer in silence and shame. 

I hate you.