Recently my baby, Anna celebrated her first birthday. It was a really bittersweet day for me because I remembered that she would not be little much longer. I was going to miss my baby, that I got to hold and feed and all those wonderful things. At the same time, I love watching her grow and seeing her personality emerge. She is such an exuberant child with a lust for life. She is such a joy to be around. With Lea to take care of as well, and in the more challenging terrible-twos stage demanding almost constant attention, Anna has seemed to learn a few things that I was not aware of. To those of you without kids this may not seem a big deal, but other parents (and especially Moms out there) will certainly understand it’s significance.
With Lea I had a huge amount of time to devote to her. She was my center of attention for the entire day, and when her father came home, she was his centre as well. I spent so much time showing, and teaching her how to do things because I had the time and I felt that it was my role. One of the skills we worked on together was stacking. I used her Fisher Price stacking toy and would put the ring in her hand, and slowly guide her hand to the post showing her how to let go at just the right moment. It took some time but eventually she figured it out.
So, one evening after I had put Lea to bed (Anna generally stays up a little later, but she sleeps more during the day), Anna and I were enjoying some quiet time together and I thought, what better time to show her the rings. I pulled them out, took the colored rings off and set them around her on the floor. I gave her the correct rings and was not prepared for her to take the ring and slide it on like it was no big deal. When did she learn how to do that? Is this what it’s going to be like for her? Learning from watching her sister and then waiting patiently to show me what she can do? I hugged her a little tighter that night because I knew my baby was growing up, that pretty soon she’d be a toddler, fighting for her own place and discovering who she is.
The Cheese face starts early!
"Where's that red one that goes on top?" - OK, maybe not :)
"Now what!"
Then! Then! To top it all off, in a matter of days she has learned how to do this:
Holy cow! We were shocked. We’ve been spending some with her and practicing walking between us but it seems as though overnight she has figured out how to walk! On her own, for great distances! (well, across the room, to us it seems like miles!) My gut feeling was that she was being stubborn and was toying with us so I decided to just give her space and let her decide to do it on her own. That was a few days ago. Now, now she can do this????
My baby girl is growing up L
I don’t really know what else to title this. It’s not a eulogoy, it’s not a testimonial about what a great actor he was (I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure he was great) but more about my reaction (and that of those around me) upon hearing the news. Bee and I were driving home from a trip to the Museum of Science and Technology with the girls. The weather was bad, the roads slippery and the driving slow. Fortunately for us the girls had fallen asleep mere minutes after our departure from the museum. Now, to you guys it may not seem like a big deal to us it’s THANK GOD WE CAN TURN OFF THE WIGGLES AND LISTEN TO THE RADIO FOR A CHANGE
*ahem*
Sorry about that. But, in all honesty it was one of those times that are so difficult to come by. We had spent the afternoon in a new place with great friends and it was just a good time. Then we got some quiet time to share (albeit in traffic!) and the ability to change the cd, and we ended up actually just hanging out together. It was so nice, and much needed. Of course, while we were moving (way too slowly I might add – cmon people its winter 6 months of the year!) we were just chatting and enjoying each others’ company. Then the announcer came on and says that one of their staff was working on a story from the New York police. I don’t think we knew what to expect but it certainly wasn’t the news that Heath Ledger was found dead in his apartment.
We both looked at each other, startled with questioning looks on our faces… huh? At that point we heard no other news and had no idea as to the cause of death. We discussed his movies, his rise to the top, his upcoming movies and his relationship with Michelle Williams. We wondered if drugs were an issue but neither of us had ever heard rumors. Not that that means, it’s not possible. I did remind Bee that he and his wife just split up and that he has a 2 year old daughter but we still couldn’t figure out how this young, talented actor could die. It is very sad, and I feel for his family and his daughter. But it’s also a reminder that things aren’t always what they seem, in real life and in celebrity’s lives. They are just people , trying to get through the day like most of us. Except they have the disadvantage of having a camera thrust in their face all the time, of constantly being in the public’s eye, under surveillance, their every move tracked and recorded. That must not be easy for anyone, especially when going through a difficult time. I do realize that it comes with the territory so I have mixed emotions.
Unfortunately it’s sad when anyone dies, even famous people.
Ever since I had Lea and stopped working 2.5 years ago I decided that it was time to get my house in order. It’s not really dirty, just a little cluttered and unorganized. My friend Heather has the same goal and for a long time we would encourage each other to declutter and keep up with our cleaning etc. We both seemed to spend a whole day scrubbing and making the house shine only to be dead tired at the end and not looking forward to doing it again the next week (or whenever we had company coming over!!!). Add to that the 5 or 6 loads of laundry that we would do in a day and housework became a chore, something we dreaded and hated.
I am not going to be poetic and say that housework is now something that I enjoy, that I look forward to, that is the highlight of my day. Quite the opposite. I still dread it, BUT I like how my house looks and feels when I am on top of things. Heather, in her quest for schedules and calendars (gotta love ya!) found this great site that offers a daily chore planner. This planner includes daily chores (emptying dishwasher, making beds, emptying trash, cleaning counters, making dinner etc.) but also includes a few random chores every day. These are the things that often get overlooked or just plain forgotten. In the few short months that I have been using the planner, I have cleaned the shelves under my bathroom sinks (I’d never done that before???), all the doorknobs (I mean really, who thinks to clean doorknobs?) and other various tasks. The planner also breaks down the big chores that I so easily brush aside, even though I know they need to be done. For example, over the last couple of weeks we have been cleaning the fridge, one shelf at a time! How great is that! I can’t commit to cleaning out the entire fridge but I can take the 5 or 10 mins that it takes to clean the top shelf!
This planner also requires me to sit down and make a menu plan and shopping list and I am 100% positive that that has saved us money. I am not wondering what to make at 5pm when the girls are hungry and fussy and everything I have is frozen solid in the freezer.
The laundry part still suck. Laundry falls under the daily category which means I should be doing a load every day. I don’t mind sorting, washing, drying or folding, it’s the putting away that seems to never get done! Still, I now always have clean towels and sheets and the girls always have clean clothes, and I am not spending hours on the laundry. That’s definitely a bonus, even if it is sitting in my bedroom in the hampers lol…
There are quite a few things that have changed since I started using this chore chart. Bee has started to pitch in more (may I just say, AWESOME!) He likes to ask what my chores for the day are most times will pick one! (recently he cleaned out the microwave and the toaster). I am amazed that he is pitching in and am so very thankful to have some help. I think because there’s a plan, it’s easier for him to do stuff. He always admits to not being able to read my mind and not knowing what cleaning needs to be done so the planner solves that problem. The other perk of my new cleaning routine is that I feel that my house is always presentable. It may not always be spotless and totally organized (I do have 2 very young kids with lots and lots of toys!) but I am never embarrassed to have people just stop by. I know that there are always clean hand towels in the bathroom, the toilet is clean, there is toilet paper under the sink and my kitchen is clean. It has been so freeing to just do what the chart says and not have to decide what to do (which usually meant picking the easiest thing!).
I want to say a big thank you to Heather for sharing this Chore planner with me and for keeping me in check. We often motivate each other to stick with it and to get up and get cleaning. I don’t think the chart would be as successful if it wasn’t for her! So, thanks Heather!
And to everyone else, please feel free to come over, I know my house is clean! J
It’s a big joke in our family that Birthdays are extra special and we were always treated like little princesses. My sis and I still think that no one should have to work on their Birthdays and we’ve always exaggerated the importance of sharing that special day. Bee learned a long time ago that Birthdays mean a cake, a card and presents. There were a few years where I was disappointed when there was no cake. It’s just another example of how everyone’s rituals and customs are different.This year was a milestone year for me and I am very happy with how it all went. My birthday spanned quite a few days and a lot of people worked very hard to make it very special for me. The first celebration took place on the Friday BEFORE my birthday. Bees sisters decided to help him out and plan a surprise party for me! I was told that we were invited over to play “cards” and that’s what I was expecting. I had a hunch that there might be a party in the works (it’s kind of odd when his sis calls twice and wants to talk to HIM!) but I was pleasantly surprised nonetheless. I received a great set of luggage that I will be able to use on my trip to TEXAS!!! We had cake, and gifts and everyone had a great time.
The Sunday before my birthday (it was on a Monday) we decided to go out for dinner since Monday was a work day we figured it would be nice to go when it was more quiet. I invited my little sis to come with us and she was more than happy to join us for some drinks and tex-mex! It was so nice to spend some time with her and she is so great with the girls! I even got to open some gifts early!
Monday (my actual birthday!) I was allowed to sleep in, and basically just lazed around all day. Bee wouldn’t let me do anything to help, not even put my dishes in the dishwasher. He made me a delicious breakfast (French toast at my request!) and then pampered me the rest of the day. There were also a few gifts from him and the girls and some really sweet cards. He had also gotten me a cake so we got take out for dinner and had MORE cake for dessert!
The Birthday Extravaganza ended last night, a week later! My good friends Monica and Jon invited us and the girls over for dinner. The girls had never been to aunt momo's house and of course they just loved the puppy! We had a delicious dinner with lots of drinks and it was a great time!
Monica's new puppy Niles, LOVED Anna!All in all it was a wonderful birthday and I can’t believe that I am now a year (and decade!) older.
I have to add this picture :) This was the best card that I have ever gotten and it just reinforces my decision to go to Texas! Thanks Heather!
Not only was her first Christmas exciting, but 2 days later Anna got to celebrate her 1st birthday! In true Taylor fashion, she had 3 different parties. The first one was on her actual Birthday. Lea and I made her a cake that afternoon.
It is no surprise that Anna LOVED cake and dove right in. She is so different from Lea! Lea didn’t even want to get her hands dirty!
This is Lea on her first Birthday
She wanted nothing to do with the cake!We also had a family party for her that weekend with Bees family. She finally got her own chair! She would actually go up to Lea (when she was sitting in HER chair) and hit her until Lea got up crying and Anna could steal her chair. What a little bully! Now she has one of her very own.
I think she had a wonderful day and I cannot believe my baby is 1 year old. Where does the time go?
For the last few days I have been thinking about my upcoming, milestone birthday. Trying to sort out my feelings and decide if I was ok with it or not. Everyone was making a big deal of my becoming “old” including myself. But the truth is that I don’t feel any older. I feel almost the same as I did at 20. I say almost because I feel that the last decade has taught me so much. It has been all about transitions: a long term relationship, moving in with my future husband, getting a real job, buying a car, taking a couple of vacations, losing my mother in law, buying a house, having 2 kids, becoming a stay at home parent. It’s no wonder that my 20’s are a blur. But I honestly believe that I have changed tremendously throughout the last ten years. I am much more independent, confident and comfortable in my own skin. I make friends more easily and am less guarded and reserved. I feel like I am what I am and you can either take it or leave it, it’s your loss. I am starting to feel that life is too short for negative people or problems and I want to enjoy my time.
On the flip side, I find that I am also very bored with my life sometimes. I have not yet accepted that I am a grown up and no longer a teenager or young adult. This past Saturday night was the first time that I ever felt old. I am not sure if that was due to my approaching birthday or what, but it was around 9:30pm, I was in bed with my book, Bee was playing on his computer and I remember asking him, “is this what the next 50 years of our life is going to be like?” and at that moment, that thought depressed me. I told Bee to remind me of that thought in 10 years when the girls are late coming home or I’m fighting sleep because I have to go out and get them somewhere!
“We are all familiar with the biblical story of Joseph. In a dramatic turnaround, Joseph is transformed from jailed prisoner to prime minister of Egypt in a matter of hours. The Torah goes out of its way to tell us that Joseph was 30 years old when he began to rule over Egypt (Genesis 41:46). Why is this significant for us to know? The famous 12th century commentator Rashbam explains that at age 30 one is "worthy of leadership." Interestingly, the minimum age to run for U.S. Congress is also 30. But what is so significant about being thirty-something and being ready to lead? I found the answer in a most unlikely place-studying the laws of Rosh Hashana. The Code of Jewish Law (O.C. 581:1) instructs congregations to seek certain qualities when choosing a cantor to lead the services on the High Holidays. One of these qualities is that he should be at least 30 years old. Why? The Mishna Brura explains that it is because a 30-year-old is humble and broken hearted, and can thus sincerely "pray from the heart." It would seem that the Torah understands age 30 as a "moment of truth" when certain realities of life firmly take hold, and it is only through the acquisition of these realities that one can be a leader -- whether in public life or in prayer. What might these realities be?"
“Indeed, the Talmud (Pirkei Avot 5:26) declares: "At age 30, one receives strength." This is the strength of character needed to pursue life's goals. The 20s process of trial and error leads to a more secure decade of the 30s, when a person is focused on true talents, pursuable goals, and genuine accomplishments.”
“The old cliche is true: A jack-of-all-trades is a master of none. The 20s are the training ground to become a jack-of-all-trades. The 30s is the time to focus and master those talents that can be applied in practical directions”
What a great way to start a new decade! With feelings of strength, humbleness and the ability to become a leader?
Another article that spoke to me is this one, written by Heidi Fletcher (fitness competitor). These are some of the things that she has realized as she turns 30:
I’ve learned that as I’ve gotten older, I have become more comfortable in my own skin.
I’ve learned that doing the right thing, means doing the right thing by my standards, not someone else’s.
I’ve learned that I don’t have to settle. I have every day of my life to do that… why do it today, or even tomorrow for that matter?
I've learned that you don't have to lie to avoid saying things that are painful. It will just bite you in the ass in the end.
I've accepted that I am capable of doing whatever I put my mind to. And have reaped the rewards and benefits to prove it.
I’ve learned that trust is one of the most significant aspects of any relationship. And to lose it, usually means losing the relationship.
I've learned to accept the fact that I am worthy of significant relationships in my life and I don't have to click to "self destruct" mode when things get intense.
I’ve learned how to compromise without compromising myself in order to make life easier or happier for other people.
I've learned that I don't have to be perfect. As long as I am healthy that shows through and defines me more than anything.
I’ve learned that I am capable of independence.
I’ve learned that just because two people love each other, does not mean they should be together.
I’ve learned that people need you to understand them more than they need you to agree with them. I
I’ve learned that being a good friend and have people depend on you is just as comforting as having a good friend. And I’ve learned the importance of my friendships.
I’ve learned that it is okay to ‘grow out’ of a relationship, whether it be love, friendship or business related.
I’ve learned that people you love will hurt you. You need to make peace with it, and move on.
I’ve learned that love does come when you least expect it.
Most of all I've learned to relish my family, my mom and dad and siblings. Those people are invaluable.
I must say that I can relate to just about all of her thoughts and again, what a positive way to start my 30’s. I feel like a much stronger person who is more comfortable in the world and has a lot to offer!
I think that now that I am “settled” in my life, that my 30’s will be all about me! I have some goals that I would like to realize in this decade and most of them revolve around changing my bad habits and making myself a better person and role model for my girls. I think these will be the best years of my life, as Natalie (my little sister) said, “30 is the new 20!”
I saw this last night on Saturday Night Live. It does have language so be warned!
You may have noticed that I’ve replaced my Christmas ticker with a new one! If you haven’t seen it it’s on the right at the top of the column. Go look. I’ll wait.
See?
I am so excited!!!! I am going to Texas to finally get to meet my bestest friend in the whole wide world Heather! Heather posted on her blog the story of how we met and since I have two kids and am lazy, I am copying it here for you!
“First, at the top right you will see a new ticker. We are counting down the days until my dear friend, Marianne, flies to Texas to not only VISIT me...but to MEET me! Yes, you read that right! For those of you who do not know, I will attempt to share the story as concisely as possible. Mar and I met online at Sparkpeople.com in a New Moms group, we were trying to lose the 'baby weight'. This was around January or February of 2006. We discovered that we both liked to do the same workout...Walk Away The Pounds...and Mar had tried a few I had never even heard of. The online group we were a part of was basically anonymous, so I did not have my email public, etc. In order to share more about the workouts we ended up exchanging emails and really the rest is history. We began to have more personal discussions through emails, not only about workouts and vegetables...eventually we moved on to im'ing each other on a daily basis. I have even had phone service, off and on, that allows me to call Canada at no extra charge, so yes, we have actually spoken on the phone. OH! I think I forgot to mention she's in CANADA! Yes...she lives 1700 miles away. Needless to say, we have never met in person. So this year, for her birthday (which is Monday), her husband has given her a trip to Texas! She booked her flight the day she found out and we are so excited! I know this may sound crazy to some of you...in fact, we often call her my 'crazy Canuck friend'...but our lives are eerily similar, with 'coincidences' popping up around every corner. We have so much in common (her husband's birthday is even the same day as Riley's! I mean, seriously!?) and over the past 2 years we have become secret sharers, fashion consultants, comfort givers, co-diet busters...not just internet buddies, but true, timeless friends...the best kind of friends. So I hope everyone will be patient over the next 1 month and 4 weeks, because I know you are going to get so tired of hearing how excited I am to finally meet her in person!”
I’m coming Heather!!!
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I am so happy to have my little sister Natalie back in town. Bee was working the day of this party and she was so much help. I could not have done it without her!
Lea is still afraid of Santa. We talked about him a lot and she knew that he brought presents etc but could not be convinced to sit on his lap.
Anna is still too young to care about Santa, she was just anxious to get to the presents!!!
Lea and Bee getting cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve
Anna sampling the reindeer's Carrots. I think she approves!
Lea ever so carefully carrying the milk for Santa
Santa's snack is all ready for him to come and enjoy it!
"The stockings were hung, by the TV with care"
Christmas morning, family shot with timer lol...
Lea went right for the chocolate!
Anna was more interested in eating her toast in the living room than all the gifts!
Lea loves her new kitchen!
Christmas day at Moms. Isn't this horse great? Handmade especially for Lea!
More toys!
Lea and her Mr. Potato Head!
All in all Christmas was a blast, we were all very spoiled and got lots of wonderful gifts and had the chance to spend time with ALL members of our families. It makes for very hectic holidays, but it's once a year and totally worth it!
